El Chapo

Breaking News: Prison fears losing “5 Star” rating over El Chapo’s’ complaint.
Mexico- “Tom I’m down here in Mexico the location is not relevant because right now we have just received word that a prison is taking some drastic action to save its five star rating from El Chapo’s wrath. The Mexican drug lord has had some complaints luckily we were able to get a couple of statements from the drug lord before he was hauled into solitary confinement. ‘The steak here is never cooked to my liking, and they don’t have HBO, how am I supposed to watch Game of Thrones or Westworld without HBO, this is madness.’ Now, Tom this prison behind me has held a solid 5 stars on Yelp for the last five years. We got an interview with the owner of this prison. ‘Well I think this really reflects on us as a prison I have really tried to make this a prison that people want to visit. We have the friendliest staff, the best food, and Showtime, If El Chapon wants to watch anything why doesn’t he just watch ‘Dexter’ it’s just as good.’ We don’t at this moment know whether or not the prison here will update to fit El Chapo’s liking or not but i must say Tom it’s not looking good.”

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